I'm here to tell you that life, connection, and intimacy doesn't have to be this hard!
After dozens of failed treatments, surgery, medications, and disability permits, I was depleted. Eight years ago, I was in too much pain to walk or have clothing touch my skin. Getting out of bed felt unbearable, let alone dating, dancing, or living my purpose.
I started educating myself on the body/mind connection, and I learned that I was constantly trying to work against my body, rather than with it. Through coaching, movement, sex re-education, and alternative medicine, I slowly reclaimed my life, and beyond. I went from being unable to walk down a driveway without searing pelvic pain, to becoming a competitive salsa dancer. I went from avoiding sex and relationships, or gritting through painful sex, to experiencing deep connections, love, boundaries, and a rich sensual life.
My lifelong experience with chronic pain made me realize how tremendously under-resourced we are when it comes to helping others understand their own capacity for pleasure.
Treatments are always about fixing pain or numbing pain. I never worked with a doctor or medical professional who talked to me about pleasure or sex, which left this gaping part of my life that I navigated in my own way. Having health issues was challenging enough. I never want anyone to feel the same isolation and confusion around identity, intimacy, and connection that I felt while navigating sex (and life) with a chronic condition.
After nearly a decade of project management in public health and nonprofit education, I decided to pursue a career as a Clinical Sexologist.
My approach is to keep it real with my clients by keeping it real with myself. While I am incredibly grateful for where I am today, I don't consider myself "healed" of my health issues, and I still experience flare ups. I don't believe in selling clients an idea that doing a certain treatment modality will solve all their problems, because in my decades of chronic pain, that's never worked for me.
However, there are ways to not just survive a chronic condition, but to thrive with it, and that's what I love to share! There are tools to limit the frequency and intensity of flare ups. There are strategies to tap into unique pleasure points. I am not "fixed" of all my problems, but my health no longer caps my capacity for sexual expression, love, connection, and daily activities.
I work mindfully with clients to guide them in reaching this same sense of freedom.
One of the biggest lies we have been sold culturally is that we need to be healed of all our problems before we are worthy of a meaningful life. Chronic health issue or not, I have yet to meet a human who "figured it all out" before beginning to work, date, or leave the house. Love, sex, and intimacy are blank canvases we are constantly learning to paint on, and as your sex coach, I'm right there by your side as you discover ways to sexually flourish.
By valuing authenticity over performance, acceptance over control, and curiosity over "normalcy," I guide clients to tap into a potent, connected, euphoric form of intimacy that is seldom (...never!) expressed in porn or the media.
Where some people may see a limitation, others see a superpower.
I share my story publicly so that my clients know that they're not alone. I coach from a place of understanding and knowing what the trenches feel like. I deeply care about and CHEER for all of my clients, and I live for the moments I see others climb out of the trenches to live their best intimate lives.
I can't wait to get to know you and your story, and stand beside you as you heal, grow, and thrive.
